Roses

This morning I was thinking about how I wanted to send 12 dozen roses to my ex and thank him for bringing me down to $0 and homeless. Looking at where I’ve been in relation to where I’m going, is surreal! (And yes you can call me “Fithy”) It’s been a pushing time, a pressing time, a crying time, a determined time, a triumphant time. If I was not in that situation I would not have strived and achieved anything I am in line for now. You see, I completed 69 credit hours in 2 years with a cumulative of 3.39 Bachelors Degree. I had 3 classes on Tuesday, 1 on Thursday, and 1 on Monday and Wednesday morning. In my quest to make sure I could provide for my 5, I learned about my resilience, my tenacity, my capacity, my determination, my weakness, my strength, who was really for me, who sucks the life out of me, who I could release to, what depths would I go to, what levels could I reach, what dreams I could dream, what goals I could bring into fruition, who the little girl inside me is, her fears, her loves, my intellectual ability, my drive, …

I know many who divorce stay in a stupor. It doesn’t have to. It’s your choice. So, though cynical, I want to thank him. The same heart that kept me oppressed, broke my chains. I was stuck trying to “keep it together” and that same motivation BROKE MY CHAINS! That was the beginning of being able to breathe, go, grow, and excel. Though I know it is all God’s grace and my faith, the roses just seem so appropriate! I am soooo thankful of your choice and for me and mine going from 0 to 50 in 3 1/2 years!!!!! I think I’ll keep the roses for me and my BabyGirl … we’re worth it! (And I love me some HER!)

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